Saturday, May 21, 2011

7) Riskopoly and Tea: The Osama bin Laden of Tea

Premise: So it was down to Pain and Brosef #1.  Quickly actually.  Pain still profited from an epic secret deal that he and Duke disguised during the whole "Fuck Duke" campaign by Brosef #1.  But Pain pulled it through.  Because of time constraints he decided to agree to a draw with Brosef #1, i.e. Pain is now known as Sally the Candy Striper.

DukeOEarl:  What the hell?  Mojito flavored tea?  This should be interesting.  Pain is super drunk right now, getting ready for conquest of Brosef #1 and agrees to a tie? Wow.  Wow.  Btw we will be posting our modified Riskopoly rules pretty soon.

Upon smelling, the tea reminds me of mint shampoo.  Not a good start honestly.  Being pretty pissed off (and drunk) anything reminding me of prison showers is not going well.  I'm about to blow this fucker up because of how I was fucked in Riskopoly.  Even after steeping it smelled like mint shampoo.  Ugh.

This Mojito was very dusty and dirty.  The flavor and scent, instead of an alcoholic beverage, reminded me more of Orbit gum than an alcoholic beverage.  Wait, holy shit it's Osama bin Laden.  He just appeared for Riskopoly.  The only explanation is that Osama was coming to deliver Rapture to us!  Nice.  Do you want some /t/ Osama?  He said yes.

What: Mojito (Element Tea)
How much: $2.98 per oz
What kind: Rooibos and Black - Mint
Taste: Like brushing your teeth
Repeat Drinkability: 3/10 (how many times a day do you brush your teeth?)
Manliness: 2/10 (the last time cocktails were manly, grass was purple)

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