Monday, January 24, 2011

Alterra should stick with coff...oh my god /t/his is delicious

DukeOEarl - So Tea_Pain invites me over to cuddle, I mean drink /t/. He whips out his tin and it smells like blueberry yum yum. Actually, it didn't, but it did smell delicious.

Tea_Pain - I basically woke up that morning and said, "A'ight, today I want to drink a muffin." Since this is the case, I pretty much had to make this stuff for the blog. Luckily my birthday wasn't too long ago and I think I got some good stuff from the rents (to be determined in about...1 minute). One blend is this Blueberry Rooibos from Alterra. Smells like blueberry crack. You know how manly crack is, right? Try fruity crack. Effing. Stellar.

DukeOEarl - It's definitely rooibos...but it also tastes like blueberry pie. If Homestarrunner were to drink this, it would say, "Okay bwuebewwee tea. Wowww it tastes wike bwuebewweessssss! That's gwate." Also what the fuck are shazandra berries? I can't even say that name twice in a row and apparently they were in this /t/. They will now be known as shazam berries. Why? Honestly I don't know.

Tea_Pain - I know why they're called shazam berries: Shaq ate them enough during his days on the Magic that he went on to make a movie about them. They also cured Shaq's unbearable viral hepatitis. Anyway, Alterra loved the movie so much they decided to put them in this /t/. Makes complete sense. As for the taste, I think that if we could steep this repeatedly I wouldn't have to buy another tea. Rather than act the role of a weak herbal with a strong scent, this stuff went full retard on me and kicked the crap out of my taste buds. Though it's a little expensive for loose leaf tea, this stuff is well worth the money. A++++, would buy again.

What: Blueberry Rooibos (Loose) (Alterra)
How much: $10 for 3oz tin.
What kind: Herbal - Red, Blueberry
Taste: Like muff-diving into a blueberry patch
Repeat Drinkability: 9/10 (if you COULD steep it twice, this would be a 10)
Manliness: 9/10 (just like blueberry pie on African Christmas)


  1. Sounds Fucking amazing but its at bitch and a half to order this tea online. I'm still working on finding a seller online or retail.

  2. Yeah, since Alterra's pretty much a Milwaukee-only club, you either need to have a friend or be able to couch surf down in Milwaukee. You could always try their twitter/website and complain that they aren't fulfilling some sort of customer need.