...because I now have a surplus.
So, a few weeks back we participated in a /t/ swap on Steepster. We received a genmaicha, and I, being the genmaicha virgin, figured I should lead the discussion as I am sometimes unbiased and uninhibited. Wikipedia tells me that genmaicha stands for "people's tea". Why? Because it has a bunch of cheap ass rice in it for filler. I fucking love rice for this reason. Maybe it's because of a college mentality or maybe I'm a stingy eater. Just know that I came in intrigued by having Rice Crispies in my /t/.
And now, Tea_Pain tells a story...
Ahem, let me just take you through the experience that was my first sip of genmaicha:
1) Hm, this smells exactly like a bag of popcorn and Smacks. Where's the green /t/? I UNNO!
2) Oh, here is the green /t/. Just in case I needed proof that it wasn't fake, I tested it out in my french press. You can tell it's real green /t/ because it looks like I put my piss in the microwave.
3) Another whiff. Smells like popcorn from a ghetto movie theater. You can get a whole bucket of this stuff for $1 and gorge yourself while watching a Samuel L. Jackson-knockoff take out all the honkies.
4) Holy shit, they make water out of popcorn now?
5) Wait for it... waaaait for it.... hold on- yup there's a little hint of rice in there.
5b) (30 seconds after swallowing) Oh hey, a green /t/ aftertaste! The one thing nobody ever wants from their green /t/.
ENHANCE. There's so much dust in this /t/ that I think it'll reassemble in my large intestine. On a scale from one to fiber, this is a wool sweater. Tell gramma to screw prune juice and get some of this shit. It's not like she'll remember how it tastes 5 minutes later anyway. And if you're looking for a smoother green /t/, you're better off with some canned Arizona-brand off-shoot than this stuff. Hell, Lipton might be able to go down easier than this stuff.
I found my mind drifting off while working with this /t/. For instance, when I opened the bag, I wondered if all that stale popcorn in my cupboard would taste the same if I ground it up and mixed in some water. Shortly after the third swig, I started reminiscing about how many good-tasting /t/s I've had in the past. Or, say, when after the fifth choked-down gulp I wondered what could undo the permanent damage to my tastebuds caused by this /t/. Hell, I even tried to resteep this to see if the green /t/ flavor would come out. Luckily this pours into the sink just as fast as it brews. *And there was much rejoicing!*
What: Genmaicha (Porto Rico Importing Co.)
How much: $2.50 for ~4 oz
What kind: Green - rice
Taste: Like eating stale popcorn.
Repeat Drinkability: 1/10 (Drink directly from a rice patty, no chaser)
Manliness: 6/10 (Reminds me of this little ditty)