Monday, June 13, 2011

SPONSOR: Pyramid Scheme

I've always loved a good con: bachelors degrees from small liberal arts colleges, fake boobs, televangelists, etc. (though, when you get fucked by the fake boobs you actually enjoy it).  So when I looked into my huge box of samples and found a small sandwich bag full of /t/bags, I thought "Ok, this should make my mouth hate me today."  Oh hai, pyramid /t/bags.  Hopefully you're not as bad as the gimmick Lipton tried to pull a couple years back.  BTC better have their shit together on this one, nobody deserves to be associated with the L-word.

I opened up one of the /t/bags and was slapped by what seemed to be an angry black woman in church.  The smell was so pungent and so... good.  This smelled like the earthiest, sweetest Darjeeling I've ever witnessed.
Let's be honest, usually when I have this pungent of a /t/bag (see: anything Bigelow), it's a sign that the taste is artificial.  On top of that, the /t/ in the bag is usually worth about as much as the dirt I walk upon. Let's brew this bitch up.

Ok, BTC, it still smelled awesome as it brewed.  Caramel and, surprisingly, a little cinnamon was starting to come out.  I can dig this.  After letting it sit, I began my first sip only to realiz-HOLY FUCK THAT'S ACTUALLY LOOSE LEAF IN THAT BAG!

Yeah, that /t/ makes me thinks the bag is pointless if you weren't lazy and just cut it open.  Those leaves looked effing stellar and...I might test this out later if I have time for an update.  Brownie points on the end product's looks though.  Much like a pyramid scheme, this looks spectacular and not a spec of dust.  Here is my money. Take it all.

So, Tea_Pain, how did you break this case?  The smell, Watson.  Though the taste had some good *oomph* behind it and looked like it should be framed on a wall...the smell of the /t/ was the tip-off.  Not gonna lie, outside of every other characteristic, the /t/, for being bagged, was near incredible.  But the smell was just... I'm sorry... it smelled like Lipton.  I'm sorry.  Maybe it's just my prejudices against bad /t/, but when I'm reminded through /t/ like this... I have to use this thing people call "my conscience" and wonder why it happens to the good /t/.

It really pains me to see a /t/ like this get such a negative connotation associated with it.  I actually really enjoyed everything else.  The flavor was right up there with mid-upper grade loose leaf: vegetative, molasses, would go well with honey like PAO.  I even tried steeping the bag a second time to see if the smell might go away between brews.  Though it disappeared, so did the flavor.  This is the curse of a /t/bag.  Stick with one steep on this one and your expectations will more than likely be exceeded by this bagged /t/.

What: Darjeeling Pyramids  (Boston Tea Co.)
How much: $7.99/ box of 15 bags
What kind: Black - Darjeeling
Taste: Savory and sweet at the same time... this is the pork chop and apple sauce of /t/...but it smelled like a Boca burger.
Repeat Drinkability: 7/10  (Ease of use and taste still win over something as crushing as "Lipton smell")
Manliness: 7/10 (A lot of /t/ in that bag means there's a lot of caffeine.)

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