Well my sister discovered my stigma for herbal teas because I complained endlessly about the lack of real tea in my mother’s house. After the Pissass fiasco, I said that I’d rather steep dirt in hot water than any of the dried garbage available. Anyway, she convinced me to try some of her herbal tea that is her absolute favorite. She has a female-boner for this tea I guess. Fuck it. I already drank my own piss yesterday because I wasn’t about to try the Pissass again, so I decided to give it a taste.
The tea that makes her super horny is called Choice Organic Teas Organic Chamomile Spearmint. Organic tea is organic. In fact, it says “organic” five times on the little tea bag packet. Who cares besides hippies and pretentious housewives? No one. Whatever, I’m just going to remove those unnecessary terms. Let’s call it Choice Chamomile Spearmint. Ok, now it’s got like a real tea name. Hot water on--let’s do this.
After infusing, it looked sort of like my urine after a heavy night of drinking, minus the blood. It smelled subtly of mint and bergamot. I felt like I was in a shampoo commercial for a second. I prepared myself for a spontaneous shower by tossing my hair back and inhaling the soothing aroma. Then I realized I was a man again and just decided to drink the damn tea. Surprisingly, it did not taste like the deer urine I spray myself with every hunting season. It was rather good. The subtle mint flavor complemented the flowery chamomile taste. It was rather sweet without adding any honey, so it would be quite excellent with a lighter, flowery honey. Considering it doesn’t have any caffeine, it has potential for repeat drinkability. It still isn’t black tea though.
What: Chamomile Spearmint (Choice)
How much: $4.35 a box (20 tea bags)
What kind: Herbal - Chamomile
Taste: Like flowers and mint and sunshine
Repeat Drinkability: 5/10
Manliness: 3/10 (Sadly there is no bear on this one)
PS No man should ever propose on facebook. We might have to post about this later.